I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I can't turn off my feet"
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
