Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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