Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize