So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
