told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Randomize
