It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
