U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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