awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
i believe in u and ur pee
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
