Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
