Buhtt sex?
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
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