Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
