Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
