the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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