Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize