are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
