you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Randomize
