Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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