that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
