New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
