I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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