I cockslap morals
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
