I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Say something about gay babies.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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