So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
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