It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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