PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
