I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize