so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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