she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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