An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
