Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize