why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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