help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
