So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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