Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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