i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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