Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
