Swine flu. Run for my life!
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Randomize
