@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
