but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
I just gargled with NyQuil
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
