The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Randomize
