You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Randomize
