Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize