does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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