Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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