Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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