It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Maybe he injected his testicle?
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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