Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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