He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Randomize
