I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
