Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize