So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Is her dick bigger than yours?
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize