are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Randomize
