I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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