Rock
Scissors
Fuck
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
